Liam's room

With no real plans for Easter, we have been spending time at home catching up on things that we don't get a chance to do on the weekend.  I've had a lot of fun adding a few little extra things to Liam's room, like a photo wall and buying his bed linen.  I still have some details to finish, but I think its coming along and he loves his room!

Here is a sneak peak:

Love Wisdom Motherhood

Last Saturday afternoon I was out shopping with my two boys when I came across this book in the ABC shop.  I had heard about it and what I had heard, had me intrigued, so I bought it with aim of relaxing over the Easter long weekend to read it.

Too late.  I read it in about two days.  I couldn't put this book down.  I just loved it.  If you are a mum, and especially a working mum, you will adore this book.

In the two and a half years I have been a mother, I have pretended to have it all together.  What I love about this book is that Jessica Rowe lets us know that all mums share the same worries and fears at some stage. 

I am the first to admit that when I had Liam, I really struggled.  Not so much with Liam, but the changes within myself.  Liam was pretty much a perfect baby, who ate and slept well and slipped into a good routine.  He thrived and was happy and healthy.  At one point, I had to accept that I didn't have a handle on things and had to seek help.  I was embarrassed to do so and when I look back on that time now, I realise that I was way too hard on myself and had set myself very high expectations.

I'm so glad I picked up this book.  Its lovely to know that sucessful women such as Gail Kelly and Tina Arena have felt all the things I have felt in the time I have been a woman.  I also got some wonderful tips on how to handle work and motherhood. 

I've always wondered if 'you can have it all'.  I think everyone's 'all' is different.  My 'all' is having a son I am hopelessly in love with.  I have an amazing husband who I love with all my heart.  I have a fantastic job and a very supportive employer.  Saying that, I have good days and bad days.  Yesterday, for example was a bad day and I didn't get home until 8pm.  I missed dinnertime and bathtime and storytime.  The old me would have worked myself up about this and felt horribly guilty.  I did feel terrible, but I realised it was a one off and there was a reason I had to be at work and tomorrow would be a new day where I could start again.  Today Liam got sick and I had to leave work early.  The upside was I got to spend a whole afternoon with him and I made that time up.  So you see, it swings in roundabouts.

Jessica has a lovely way of writing and it was a book I didn't want to put down.  If you're in the market for a good book, I'd say run to your nearest bookshop.

A right royal wedding

In less than two weeks I will be glued to the tv set to see William and Kate tie the knot.

I remember my mum making a huge deal when Diana and Charles married.  I remember my brothers and I being scrubbed from top to bottom and sitting on the floor in our pyjama's with a bowl of Shepherds Pie to watch it all unfold.  I remember the pomp and ceremony and how beautiful Diana looked.

When I was newly pregnant, my mum came to visit me in Sydney and we went to the Diana exhibition at the Powerhouse Museum.  It was very emotional.  My mum and I cried throughout it.  We saw Diana's dress and the amount of work that went into it.  Diana must have been full of hope and love when she got married.  She was a wonderful mother and had a massive heart. 

I get quite teary thinking about the wedding of William and Kate.  The mother in me is so sad that Diana won't be there to see her son get married, but I am sure she will be there in her own way.  I love her sons, and I for one hope and pray this is blessed and happy union.

I am going to my mum's on the day itself.  We've decided to wear our veils and will be having high tea and a lot of champagne cocktails with some close female friends and family.  I cannot wait and am so excited!

There is nothing better than a royal wedding.

Easter memories...

The Easter break is one of my favourite holidays.  

While I am counting away the days/hours/minutes/seconds to that lovely 5 day break, I take a minute to remember some of the very memorable Easters I have had in the past 3 years. 

Easter 2008

Easter always brings the promise of new life and a few days before Easter,  I found a new life making itself known in my tummy.  I was newly pregnant and enjoying my little bump and the very cute ultrasound picture we were about to obtain.  I'll never forget how hungry I was in the first trimester.  I remember going to a cafe and eating 6 hash browns in one sitting. 



Easter 2010

I'll always remember this time last year as one of the worst and best periods of my life.  I was depressed, moody, cranky, snappy and couldn't find my 'spark' for life.  Little did I know I was not well and instead of listening to my intuition and going to a doctor once and for all to fix this nagging feeling I felt for the previous 18 months, I had let it fester.  My body was telling me something wasn't right.  One day at work, I burst into tears when I couldn't eat my sandwich.  The food I had been eating for the past few days wouldn't go down and I was waking up with severe reflux in the middle of the night.  In the end, my husband took me to the emergency department and I was diagnosed with a severly inflamed liver and a gallbladder that was about to burst.  I've never felt so ill in my life and during those two weeks off work I started to think about all the things that were important in life.  I thought about how much I loved my family and what blessings I had.  I've learnt now how important it is to take care of my health, listen to my body and put myself first.  Now, I am back to my super chirpy self and life is so much better. 

Easter 2011

I can't wait to have those five glorious days off.  We have no plans, no committments.  We have jobs to do around the house and fun places to take Liam.  I'm planning to eat chocolate, snuggle up to my boys, have a long bath, sleep and eat lots of hot cross buns with melted butter.  I'm making new memories with my little family and I hope this year is the beginning health, happiness and fun.

Liam has a baby

Every Monday, I find a spare few minutes to fill out a form entitled 'What did you do on your weekend?'.

I fill it in, and email it back to Liam's director of childcare.  Basically, the centre is becoming accredited and each week they focus on a new learning module.  By giving them a rundown of our weekends together, they can pick out certain themes and incorporate it into Liam's week, therefore making sure there is a strong link between home/family/childcare.

Today went a little something like this:

'On Saturday morning we woke early and decided to catch the train together and go and have breakfast.  Afterwards, we went to Toys R Us and bought Liam a cash register as he likes to play 'shopping'.  Liam's dad also found an Ernie hand puppet that he took a liking to.  Liam likes to shove Ernie up his t-shirt and pretend he is pregnant.  Ernie is now referred to as The Baby'. 

I re-read it.  Why is my son pretending to be pregnant?  Is he telling me something? 

Luckily we didn't have to witness a birthing scene.  The Baby is magically pulled out from under his t-shirt and 'borned'.

I emailed the form off to the director.  Good luck with that!

Time Out

I really love spending time on my own.  Just to sit with my own thoughts and watch the world go by.  Its something I miss because these days it doesn't happen too often.  But that's ok, because when it does happen, I appreciate it more.

My boss told me on Friday afternoon that we could finish at 4pm.  I had a whole spare hour to fill before I met up with Rich and Liam.  What's a girl to do?  I had bought a Practical Parenting magazine on Toddlers that I wanted to read so I decided to take myself off to King Street.  King Street is beautiful, a small little street with designer stores and tempting windows.

I ordered a hot cup of tea, a slice of cake, set the alarm on my phone and relaxed.  I watched the people walk by on their way home and read my magazine in peace.  It felt lovely to have that time to just me. 

My alarm sounded.  It was time to go home.  Join the throng of people on the train.  Make dinner, do bathtime and read bedtime stories.  Make a list of things to do on the weekend.  Hang out washing and play hide and seek with Liam. 

I hope you all had a great weekend x

Quality not Quantity

After our Xmas break this year I made myself a promise that if I was going to try and give this work/life balance a good shot, I would need to make more time for my family.

My little family are number one anyway and whatever I am doing I am always thinking of them first.  This year we have made a few little changes to make sure I can spend as much time as I can with Liam and Rich.  We got a cleaner in which already has made an enormous difference to the way we spend our weeknights and weekends.  The other thing I wanted to do was to volunteer some time at Liam's childcare and also take a day off work every second month so Liam and I could spend the day together.

Today Liam's childcare centre had a Harmony Day Morning Tea.  Grandparents, carers and parents where invited and we get to look at our child's portfolio and at what they do everyday, while meeting other parents and children.  I know I lack confidence and assurance in my role as a mother and I am forever feeling guilty that Liam spends a large part of his week in childcare and with my mum.  After today, I can stop feeling like this.  I had a fantastic chat with Liam's educators and Liam pretty much left me to it.  I had a coffee and a slice of cake and met all the other wonderful families.  While watching Liam in his own environment, I saw he was kind and loyal to all the other kids in his room.  He goes over to someone when they are upset to see that they are ok, and the best thing of all?  He looked so happy and calm.  I watched him interact with his educators and they are brilliant with him and he shows them love, affection and respect.  My heart swelled.  I am so proud of my little boy. 

After our morning tea, I took Liam to lunch at Ikea.  He picked out his lunch and we sat at the table and had a conversation about our morning so far.  Afterwards we picked up a few things and then headed home for an afternoon nap.  Then we went to the supermarket and playground. 

It was a perfect day.

I am beginning to realise that I am making my own rules about how to be the best mother I can be.  Once I let go of the massive expectations I put upon myself and asked for help, and let things happen as they should, I found a weight lift.

Liam brings out patience and love in me I didn't know that I had.  It doesn't matter if I am at work during the week.  What matters is the time I have with him is solely devoted to him and he is my focus.  I can separate my work life and once 5pm comes around I am mum.  I am a wife.  I am me.  Quality...so much better than Quantity.

When you sleep...

When you sleep......

* I marvel at how perfect you are
* I wonder if I could ever feel more at peace looking at you
* I shake my head in disbelief that you grew in my body
* I smile at your noises
* I laugh at the faces you pull
* I feel my heart explode out of my body
* I tell myself that this is what unconditional love feels like

Sleep tight Liam.  We love you.

xxx

Our House

When Richard, Liam and I moved back to Perth at the end of 2009, one of the first things we wanted to do was to buy a house.

This would be the first home that Richard and I had bought and our first as a family.  It was a huge moment for us, and pretty much one we didn't want to stuff up.

For a good six months we spent every weekend looking at houses.  Nothing seemed to be right.  There were a few we could have imagined ourselves in, but nothing was grabbing us.  I think buying a home, and we were looking for a family home, is an emotional decision. 

Mermaid Way found us.  There are so many things about this house that are meant to be.   The frangipani tree in the backyard makes me think of a relative who sadly passed away when I was pregnant, and I remember she gave me a bouquet of flowers after her wedding reception when I was 5 and the smell of the frangipani's each morning when I go outside remind me of her.   

The minute we pulled up to the driveway of our home, I just knew.  I am not really a demanding person, but I do remember getting back into the car after the viewing and saying to Rich 'please make sure we get this house'.

I couldn't sleep until we made our offer and it was another day of pacing around before we heard our offer was successful.  6 weeks later we moved in.

We are starting to make our mark now.  Small touches have been added and there are big things we will do at the end of the year.  I love coming home every night.  This house is our home because it is filled with love, noise and life.  I see ourselves here for a long time yet.